Travel Oops: Friday Funny Sign — Stuck in Garfield? Guess You’re SOL

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

Garfield, Colorado, USA. Better not have a breakdown or stall even at the mall in this small mountain town. Despite the promising AAA sticker, you’re unlikely to get service from this joint. Not to mention, the “only mall” doesn’t appear to have beer, braunschweiger or munchies either. Totally SOL.

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

© Stephanie Glaser 2013

Travel Oops: The Unfortunate Photo — Loving Our London Fogs

© Edward Schuck

Me, my sister, Suzie, and my mom, Judy. © Edward Schuck 1980

Monterrey, California, USA. I don’t think my dad took a photo from our family trip to San Francisco and the towns along Highway 1 in which we are not wearing our trench coats. Granted, the weather was fairly overcast and cloudy, but dang, we got more than our money’s worth with this rain-ready apparel. Clearly, I had a prominent Dutchboy bowl haircut.  Constantly being mistaken for a boy, I  definitely was in the awkward years.

© Edward Schuck 1980

© Edward Schuck 1980

Classic cable car shot: My sister and I look like we’re in a Rice-a-Roni — “The San Francisco Treat” ad. The guy in the red sweater and leather jacket brings some much-needed style into the photo.

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Travel Teacher Oops — “I came to hear The Outsiders, Miss.”

© sashafatcat

A bowl of grits © sashafatcat

If an American from the South had heard my bogus southern accent, that person probably would have thrown a bowl of grits in my direction or doused me with sweet tea. My Australian year 8’s, however, didn’t particularly detect the lack of authenticity.

They actually seemed somewhat engaged as I read them The Outsiders, so I drawled out the dialogue and got my y’alls polished up real good.

Painting by Roelant Savery

Painting by Roelant Savery

It’s not every day that you experience a victory in education. In fact, a VE day can be pretty elusive, like looking for a rare bird or any endangered species. When I was an exchange teacher in Australia, finding success was like searching for the dodo. Non-existent.

I felt like such an incompetent teacher, and every time I talked to my Australian counterpart, Dash, who was teaching my American classes, his updates deflated my spirits even more.

“Ah, yeah! Steph, we had a breakthrough today in Senior English; Madelynn* read a poem, revealing the abuse and torment she experienced as a child,” he e-mailed me one day. “It was the first time she’d told anyone. The event was so cathartic that we all had a good cry.”

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Travel Ahh…Seeing Wildlife in the Wild

© Edward Schuck

© Edward Schuck

I’ve always liked zoos; in fact, I was a junior zookeeper when I was in seventh grade, living in Santa Barbara, California. However, nothing quite compares to seeing animals in their natural habitat — in the wild (albeit some are in wildlife preserves.) The photo of the hippo (above) and the other photos of African animals were taken by my dad in Tanzania. I think they are fantastic and I feel as if I’ve seen the creatures myself. Someday I will get to Africa, until then, I’ll look at photos.

The other photos are various pictures I took on our travels.

© Edward Schuck

© Edward Schuck

Tanzania, Africa. A mother lion and her cubs.

© Edward Schuck

© Edward Schuck

Tanzania, Africa. An elephant herd.

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Friday Funny Sign: “Shovel Not Included”

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser

Colorado, USA, Along highway 285. Dirt can be a hot commodity — by the truckload —  but this little snow encrusted pile seems like it might be better for a batch of mud pies. I saw this on the way to Denver International Airport and didn’t have time to take a photo. Surprisingly, it was still there when Kurt, the kids and I returned to Colorado a week later. I’m guessing it’s not going anywhere.

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser

Travel Oops: The Unfortunate Photo — “Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oi Oi Oi!!”

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser 2010

Sydney, Australia, The Opera House.  I love this picture, but this is one of those photos I’m sure my son, Eddie, will look back at and go, “Really, Mom? Why did you dress me that way…what were you thinking?!”  We actually hadn’t meant to have him wear the Down Under shirt. We had limited clothes that we were wearing in Sydney because we didn’t yet want to disturb our massive suitcases that we packed for our year-long adventure in Adelaide. Eddie, who was 4-years-old at the time, did not want to pose for the photo in the first place. He did, however, like the orange color of this shirt that we had purchased for him the day before.

All we needed was Paul Hogan to photo bomb this and say, “Hey, America, visit Australia and let’s put another shrimp on the barbie!” (I recently saw the old ad in which he says something to this effect and consequently, misleads a few generations of Americans to repeat that phrase, thinking it as authentic.)

Travel Oops: What Happens in Vegas Sometimes Comes Back With You

© Stephanie Cadmus

© Stephanie Cadmus 1998

Two out of three Vegas cab drivers recommend Tattoos R Us to their riders who ask. At least those were the results of an informal poll about where to get tattoos taken by my friends Steph, Anne and me. This data, along with a prominent ad featured in the Las Vegas Yellow Pages, came in handy when, ultimately, I wanted a bit of rebellion — in a pretty mainstream sort of way.

© Lasvegaslover

© Lasvegaslover

Fed up with a brutal Minnesota winter and a bad breakup, I made a last-minute decision to join my friends Anne and Steph on a girls’ weekend trip to Las Vegas. A good dose of Vegas guarantees a distraction at the very least.

The schedule of pool time, nap time, get-ready time, dinner drinks and dancing time was perfect although no rebellion there.

Of course, one goal of my friends was to devote some time to the casinos. They went for Blackjack, Craps and Roulette.  I cranked ten dollars through a slot machine and declared I was done. That was the cost of a CD after all.

©  Raul654 at en.wikipedia

© Raul654 at en.wikipedia

Because, at that point, I ranked everything in terms of loss, I couldn’t get into the mode of gambling. Every day at breakfast, our group would recap the winnings and losses of the previous evening. “I’m $2,000 down after last night,” said one of Anne’s friends. “But the night before I was $4,000 up.”

What the — Just cut your losses — GET OUT NOW was all I could think. After expressing concern over the up and down developments, I sensed outrage.

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The Travel Ahh…Sometimes the Everyday is Extraordinary

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser 1995

Clichés are, by nature, tired and worn out. But the ordinary to some people may be the extraordinary to others. We have lasting images of clothing, food, drinks, professions, activities and buildings that are associated with certain countries. Some people would call these clichés. But seeing these images can be quite exciting. Recently, a friend from Australia was visiting us in Colorado and spotted deer in our back yard. We think nothing of it, and if anything, get annoyed since they eat our juniper trees. However, to our friend, it was amazing, and he couldn’t believe they were so close. Plus, this was a brand new animal for him to see.

In Greece, I wanted to see whitewashed windmills against a brilliant blue sky or sea (photo above). Speaking of windmills, how can you visit Holland and not want to see them along with tulip fields?  So again, the common, mundane and everyday can be extraordinary to a visitor. Finally, no one can say that Flamenco dancing, Legong dancing and Cliff diving are mundane!

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser 1995

Naxos, Greece: Thinking of how pretty the contrast of the white is on the barren brown landscape.

© Stephanie Glaser 1989

© Stephanie Glaser 1989

Kinderdijk, the Netherlands: Getting to see a lineup of windmills.

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser 1989

The Netherlands: Being excited to see tulip fields in full bloom.

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser 2010

Bali, Indonesia. Admiring the beauty of the rice fields and dedication of the workers.

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Friday Funny Sign: Walk-ins Welcome but Leave Your Saddle at the Door, Please

© Stephanie Glaser

© Stephanie Glaser

Colorado, USA. The west may be wild, but you can still look good — even if you’re a horse, right? This part of the country does love their horses and people have a tendency to name anything from bars to beauty salons “Wild Horses.”

Travel Oops: The Unfortunate Photo — “I’m checking out her…form”

© Edward Schuck

© Edward Schuck 2012

Copenhagen, Denmark: International Sand Sculpture Championship. Who can blame this man (on the far left) for checking out this form? The sculptures at this competition are truly amazing art, especially this beautiful one of a curvy naked woman. The funny thing is that his travel party is moving on and he lingers, pretty much transfixed.